I Love You Period.

Pinterest is definitely a fun place to get creative ideas.  I really enjoy finding unique ideas, and I think it's a wonderful site.  Recently I've seen this pin posted a lot...

And I've even seen a few blogs that have talked about making this identical frame.  The idea in and of itself is simple and cute.  You can frame a sheet of paper and frequently update the message with a dry erase board marker on the glass.  I have often left Mathis notes on our bathroom mirror with a dry erase marker --  I think this is a fun, great idea.  But I have to be completely honest that the wording of this particular frame really bothers me.  Yes, I love that Mathis washes my car, cleans the dishes, takes care of our dogs, and cooks us meals.  But I do not love him for these things.  These things are nice, but they do not constitute my love for him.  If they did, my love for him wouldn't withstand very much.  I know I'm probably being petty about the semantics involved here, but it's a very important issue with me.

I choose to believe that true love -- the kind of love Christ has for us -- loves when someone hurts us.  It's so easy to love someone who we admire and like.  It's a far different thing to love someone when we don't like what they're doing, when we struggle with their faults and failures.  To me a marriage is at it's most beautiful when you continue to love each other despite the sin -- when you live out your vows by loving through the "worse" times we so quickly sweep under the rug.  I love that we romanticize marriage -- it is romantic, and it is wonderful BUT it is also really, really hard.

And it frustrates me when we aren't always honest about this.  I get really irritated when we seem to talk about marriage like some big fairy tale.  The expectations that we place into marriage are often far from the reality.  And in reality I consider it much more romantic that we continue to love our spouses when they aren't perfect.  And let's be honest, none of us are perfect.  I am so far from perfect it isn't funny.  I have a hard time with forgiveness, and I can hold onto grudges for way too long.  I overreact to small things, and I have a hard time letting go of insignificant details and letting go of control.  I can be very moody and selfish -- and that's only the beginning.  But the fact that Mathis still chooses to love me and sharpen my heart towards that of Christ is so amazing to me.  Mathis has many faults too.  I'm not ashamed or embarrassed to write that.  Yes, there are many wonderful things about him too -- things I appreciate and things I'm proud of.  But if he wasn't all those things, I would still choose to love him.  I made that choice four years ago, and I make it each and every morning I step foot out of bed.  Sometimes it's a pretty easy choice, and other days it's the hardest choice I've ever had to make.  Ultimately I can't do it on my own.  I have to allow Christ's love for me pour out onto others, like Mathis.  I don't always allow this to happen, but it's something I strive for.  1 John talks about this kind of love -- the love that comes from God.

We're so used to a society that attaches love to our works and our personality.  We're liked because we dress nice, work hard, have money, tell great jokes, etc.  God looks past all these things, and loves us period.  It's something that I wish I could do better with others in my life -- love them regardless of their actions or superficial qualities.  And it's certainly something I hope I can do in my own marriage.